When Your Only Tool is a Hammer…


Today our topic is sex addiction. But first, this side trip:

It was only nine years ago that civilization as we know it was about to collapse. The then-pending doom was supposedly the result of a flaw in computer programming going back 50 years called Y2K.

As you recall, nothing happened.

That shouldn’t have surprised anyone.  All of the available information was provided by people who, for an additional fee, would help you solve the Y2K problem.

One could (and frankly should) be that skeptical about everything in life. Start by asking how the bearer of news benefits from your acceptance of that news.

Who benefits more than the preacher when you start looking over your shoulder for the Devil? Who benefits more than the stockbroker when you become concerned about growth in your 401(k)? Who benefits more than the politician when you become concerned about the local crime rate?

People who have a vested interest in your problem shouldn’t be trusted to diagnose.

Like the diagnosis of sex addiction, as an example.  Perhaps they mean well.  When people see their problem in your life, they assume their solution is the only acceptable answer.

When I was in college, I took a test to determine whether I was an alcoholic. Of course, I was. At least, according to the test. Some of the questions were:

  1. Do you drink to the bottom of the bottle?
  2. Do you ever “make out” better when you’ve been drinking?
  3. Have you ever felt guilty after drinking?

Hell, yes, I drink to the bottom of the bottle. Who would throw out half a bottle of perfectly good booze? I may take me several weeks to finish, but that wasn’t the question, was it?

Did I make out better when drinking? Probably. I drank around women who were also drinking. We all understand that booze lowers inhibitions.  Especially among women.  “Here, Dear… let me pour you another.

Have I felt guilty afterward? Of course. See question number two.

Today, however, our topic is sexual addiction.

Here’s the sexual addiction test.  Yes, I have taken it.  Of course I’ve taken it.  (You will, too, now that you’re thinking about it, won’t you?  You do want to know, don’t you?  Yeah, I understand).  Not surprisingly, I’ve been diagnosed as an addict.  OK, technically the actual wording claimed my “profile is consistent with men who struggle with sexually compulsive behavior.”

I have a different theory. I suspect that sex addiction is a concept created by somebody’s wife somewhere who grew weary of her husband constantly “bothering her.”  She tried to prove that there was nothing wrong with her, but her husband was SICK.

Thus: Sex addiction.  A moral judgment disguised as science.

Can anyone in a normal relationship truthfully answer those questions without being suspected of sexually compulsive behavior?  (Go ahead.  Take the test.  You know you want to.  Let me know how you score.  I’m genuinely curious).

According to my new theory there is no sex addiction, there are only people with mis-matched libidos.

If you’re lucky enough to find a partner who’s genuinely interested in lots of lovin’, you don’t have a problem. You have cause for rejoicing.

If it makes you happy, do it.

Just remember to be safe.

And stop feeling guilty.

Discuss Sexual Addiction in the forum.

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One Response to “When Your Only Tool is a Hammer…”

  1. Boogie says:

    Hello everyone, My name is boogie…and I am a sexual addict. “Hello Boogie”

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